Thursday, June 4, 2009

Like the deserts miss the rain.

Things i've done without my xbox since it broke.

  • Turned it on and prayed that it will magically work again about 8000 times.
  • Sat there and given it 'the eye'.
  • Shaken it like a disgruntled boyfriend does his incompetent girlfriend.
  • Slapped it around like a suspicious girlfriend does her slimy boyfriend.
  • Accidentally judo chopped my front door open while the neighbours were watching. They already hate me so it doesn't matter. I don't know why they hate me either, if they can't say good morning loud enough for me not to ignore them that's their fault.
  • Almost called Microsoft about having it repaired.
  • Sparked numerous conversations with complete strangers about their core hardware failures and how they dealt with it.
  • Attempted to watch commercial television. It isn't that bad once you switch the television off.
  • Attempted to build a new xbox out of an empty drawer and the insides of an old mobile phone.
  • Attacked people in the street for no reason, always ending the attack with "Ooohhh, sorry i don't have a working xbox 360 you fucking show off!"
  • Held minute long conversations with friends and family without resorting to leaving halfway through and playing xbox.
  • Borrowed a ps3. I refuse to play it until the xbox is out of the house through fear of electrical storms and domestic violence.
  • Sat in my room and written completely pointless blog posts about what i've done since my xbox broke, secretly wishing that when i post it my xbox will realize how unfair it's being and start working again.
I'm going to go make myself a dang quasadilla.

No comments: