Thursday, August 7, 2008

omgwtf Infarreds4evaz!!!333806-101!!1



I work in a shop that sells shoes. As of a few years ago, being overly into sneakers became cool. Even i was bitten by the bug. For some reason I thought it would be totally sweet if i bought heaps of shoes and didn't wear most of them on the off chance that someone would come to my house and peep my elite sneaker collection. Now they are all at Wear2 in Fremantle.
No shoe is cooler than the above though. It's been re-released close to a thousand times and every time it is re-released a new bunch of a-holes come out of the woodwork claiming that they are da bomb because they bought their re-releases before the new jacks did, not realising that they are new jacks themselves. I'm not going to deny that it is a nice shoe, because it is. All the colours work nicely together, it has an actual history and the Air Max 90 silhouette is hard to fuck with. I am saying that it's a bit sad when i get fully grown men breaking down in tears on the phone because they might only be able to buy ten pairs as opposed to the original fifteen that they intended to dominate the sneakerhead forums with.

Here's an example of a conversation i had yesterday. Keep in mind that most infarred customers are the rudest people you would ever encounter.

Me: *standard retail greeting*

Adult: "Are the infarreds in yet?"

Me: "Good afternoon sir, how are you?"

Adult: "Infarreds, where iz they?"

Me: "We spoke to nike yesterday, they had a mess up at the warehouse and they are being air-freighted this afternoon, meaning that they should be here tomorrow. How many pairs did you want?"

Adult "I WANT THIRTY PAIRS!!! MUHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Me: "I'm sorry sir, we may not be able to meet such a request, we have other customers that are just as keen on the shoe as you are, but are happy with just one pair".

Adult: *quietly sobbing* "What means one pair??"

Me: "One pair as in, no re-sale and you actually have to wear them instead of keeping them in the closet like a gay person".

Adult: *fully grown man crying at this stage* "I WANTZ THIRTY PAIRZ!! NO SHARING!! RE-SALE!!"

Me: "Look, we'll give you twenty five pairs but that is the best we can do."

Adult: ..............*gunshot followed by body hitting the floor*

Me: "Are you there sir?"

Adult: *beep beep beep beeeeeeep*


That's how it (pretty much) went down. And yes, i'm aware i spelt infrareds wrong throughout the post. 'Infarred' is the preffered spelling used by sneakerheads that can't control their excitement.

I'm dedicating this post to my fellow blogger Garth at www.yeah-homies.blogspot.com, who, while appreciating footwear more than i do, feels my pain.

I'm still copping a pair, maybe four.

1 comment:

Yeah-Garth said...

HAHAHAHA!
I can only imagine your pain over the next few days.

My prayers are with you.

I gots 99
Problems
& In4reds
Are All
Of Tehm